Customer Relationship Mismanagement is what happens when you invest in best possible automation solutions with recommendations from top management consulting firm, but with a bunch of duds onboard.

A couple of days ago, I realized new password for my net banking account is invalid hence had to walk down to the branch to deposit some funds to my friend’s and sister’s account. Both my sister and a friend hold an account in the same bank as mine but in different cities.

Banking in the counter is a terror for me, I rather trust some algorithms written to handle a set of processes than a few idiots who sit behind the “teller” counter. The sad part of today’s banking (not all the banks, but a copule of them) is despite of all technology advancements and innovations, many officers at the counter have just refused to grow (change) and stuck up with their old-timed fashion of doing business.

I walked to the ATM, withdrawn the monies (fairly a large sum, close to what my maximum withdrawal limit per day) and walked into the counter, filled up all the stupid forms to hear that cash deposit to other account is not possible! And, the dyslexic banker had no reason to give but blaming bank’s policies.

I was a bit agitated by the counter man’s response, but without losing cool asked him to provide me with reasons as to why he cannot accept cash deposit and if it is a mandate by the central bank – No answer, felt like giving him a tight-slap on his dirty stubble cheek or punch his droopy eyes.

I am ready to accept the policy, even it is Bank specific. The point is, I deserve an acceptable answer and he was testing my patience. Lost my cool, gave him piece of my mind which surely would have embarrassed him during the peak business hour. He had requested me to deposit the fund back into my account and asked me to give two cheques to my sister’s and friend’s account and promised to transfer the funds immediately.

So, the logical possibility behind the policy is to keep track of who is depositing to which account. And, in case of any issues in the future, the Bank should be able to track-back and catch hold of the person liable for any crisis – To be honest, I like it. This, is my commonsensical inference and I could very well be right, having seen the drama. Question is, why the idiot who is hired to serve me not told/informed about this.

The bank I have been referring to is one of the largest Banks in India, an institution that supposedly understands everyone’s the world! Holy Cow! What a crap! Their own house is not in order and they are able to understand other’s world.

The sad part is, this institution had invested considerable amount of sum (which is being funded by your and my account) in introducing various technology advancements and innovations. But, if you continue to have duds on board, what is point is going for any technology advancement?

My dear bank, it is very important to remember any investments on technology or innovation will go down the drain if people behind are a bunch of morons. You have two choices to make – Either pull up the socks and service your customers well thus retain them. Or, don’t waste your money and just be an equivalent of a government run institution.